My 5 year old Pomeranian/American Eskimo mix will not play? (with additional questionable behavior)?

Question

About 3 years ago, I adopted a female Pomeranian/American Eskimo mix named Katie (the mutual name was not intended lol) from a local animal rescue. The woman we had purchased her from said that she was found in an abandoned house with around 20-some other Pomeranians and Pomeranian hybrids. She is by far the sweetest dog you will ever meet. But she does have a few questionable habits she'd developed over her period of neglect.

First of all, for the first few years we had her, she would absolutely NOT leave from under my bed. When we called her, she would come out only to quickly glance at us, then dart straight under my bed frame again. Or, if we'd give her a treat of some sort, she'd take it and run and eat it quickly under my bed yet again, and stay there for hours at a time except to eat or go potty. We discussed this behavior, and we decided that it was most likely because she had been abused once before. She does NOT like big, hairy loud men. She will bark and snarl at any one of them who walks through the door, including my dad; even though no one has done absolutely anything to harm her or hurt her feelings. So maybe she was abused by a big tall man with a beard, and the image still haunts her and causes her to tolerate, but not trust Dad; no matter how much he rubs her or gives her treats.

Just recently, we got rid of the old carpet in my bedroom and replaced it with hardwood floor. Since day 1 of the new floor, Katie has not once went under the bed. What used to be her sanctuary filled with the familiar scent of her, and my underwear (yes, she would occasionally sneak into the laundry room and drag my underwear and socks under my bed) was now gone. So, now she just sleeps on top of my bed with me every night. This has caused her to come out and interact more with the family, and bond with me even more. Now we cuddle on the couch, go for rides, she roams the front yard freely with no chain.

Now, anyone who walks into my room, she will bark like crazy at them and nip at their hands any time they come near me while I'm laying down. She actually bit my boyfriend at one point because we were just playing around, not even being rough. One time he picked me up and started running, and she attacked his leg. She loves to go "bye-bye" with me in the car, and occasionally her and I will cruise around together and go to PetsMart. Now when I leave for work in the morning, and she hears my keys jingle, she will dart to the back door and wait for me to let her out to go to the car. When she realizes she is not going, she will jump at the door from the inside and tear up the blinds, barking frantically all in the while. It's like leaving your child at day care for the first time, every time. And, she will not eat unless it is outside eating from our 9 year old German Shepherd's food bowl while she is not looking, even if I mix soft food in with the same food the other dog eats in her own bowl inside.

While the emotional attachment she has with me now is flattering and exactly what I wanted in the first place, it is definitely causing some damage to the interior of the house, and worst case scenario, people. This is why I want her to start playing with toys. She will not play with them at all. She never has. I have tried and tried to get her to play around with little stuffed lamb chops, and those weird long stuffed dogs you get at pet stores, just to keep her busy and happier while I'm gone working weird shifts. There was only 1 toy she ever loved and tore it to pieces, and it was a little 99 cent pink and blue stuffed bone from the dollar store. But she has never played with another one since. I think she would enjoy herself more and be a little less sensitive and worried if only I could teach her to play.

I know this is a lot to ask, and I'm sorry for the big long essay on behavioral issues with my dog, but maybe even a little bit of advice on just one of the topics would be a great help. I don't want her to stress out; she's my baby and I just want her to b happy. Please give me a few tips, pointers, or advice? Thank you so much!!!

Answer 1

Hello,

It sounds like though you are a devoted and caring pet owner, you have been going the wrong way about it: encouraging and nurturing Katie's behaviour until it has led to behaviour problems.

A good relationship with your dog should not involve these types of behaviours. By allowing Katie to misbehave and stay fearful, you have lost her respect---it is an unhealthy relationship for both of you. Spoiling dogs usually just makes them more stressed, and it definitely doesn't help their behaviour.

You have allowed her to "own" you, which makes her all the more upset and confused about protecting you and staying with you.

Try to set your emotions aside. Repeat this in your mind. Read http://dogs-for-kids.blogspot.ca/2011/04/how-our-dogs-see-us.html. Katie really should not be sleeping with you in a bed, especially with the behaviour problems you are struggling with right now. Get a soft, comfortable dog bed and place it beside yours. Don't worry--she will adjust.

If you want her to be happy, remember, first and foremost, dogs want to be treated like dogs. It is disrespectful to them to treat them like furry humans. When we do, both dog and owner suffer.

I honestly don't believe her initial fearfulness was from abuse. 80% of owners that have adopted a fearful dog believe that their dog was abused, but usually, the fear is caused by lack of socialization and/or genetics.

If Katie was living in an abandoned house, she probably did not receive much contact with humans, and even if she did before, she received very little since there were so many other dogs. Her behaviour is completely stereotypical of an animals "fear" instincts--avoiding large, loud, bearded men; hiding, etc. are perfectly instinctual behaviours for a scared animal. From the sounds of her behaviour, it seems highly improbable that she was abused. Instead, it sounds like she was not used to humans, human noises, and human contact, and displayed perfectly normal behaviour because of her fears. Dogs do develop these fears from lack of socialization, not necessarily abuse. Even her specific fear of bearded/loud/large men is natural, since timid animals tend to instinctually avoid this type of person because they are well, more "scary"!

She has bonded with you like you hoped, but she didn't exactly bond the right way. Ideally, bonding should develop through activities like training and exercising as well as spending lots of quality time together and affection. Unfortunately, for you, it seems as if you skipped the training part--maybe because of her initial fears, maybe because you felt sorry for her, maybe because she was hard to work with. Dog/owner bonds tend to be even stronger when the owner is the pack leader in the relationship, not the other way around. She can't settle down and play with toys because she thinks she has so much responsibility: defending you, staying by your side, etc. If you can change your relationship, she will feel relieved and so much better.

Google Cesar Millan; watch his show "The Dog Whisperer" and read/hear what he has to say. He may help you and Katie a lot.

Yes, a Kong is an ideal toy for her! Lots of exercise (walking at your side) is definitely needed.

For her separation anxiety, view my answer on a different question, which has another helpful link in there too: https://answersrip.com/question/index?qid=20120831180323AAQqtOK . You may need to enlist the help of a professional dog trainer for this problem before it escalates.

Practice obedience and training daily. Have her respect your rules and boundaries. Avoid giving her excess affection at this point. Every day, try to conquer one of her problems or fears. Don't give up!

For her picky eating habits, choose one 6-star quality dog food (check it at www.dogfoodanalysis.com) and stick to it. Try not to free-feed, as this just reinforces picky eating. Twice a day, call her, have her sit, and set the food bowl down. Set the timer for 15 minutes. After 15 minutes, pick it up and put it away (she can eat all she needs easily in 15 mins), even if she hasn't eaten a thing. She may ignore it for the first 2-3 feedings, but by the fourth she should be hungry enough to show some interest. Soon, she will eat when you set it down.

Good luck with Katie! She'll come around with hard work, patience, consistency, and effort!:)

Answer 2

Pomeranian American Eskimo Mix

Answer 3

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RE:

My 5 year old Pomeranian/American Eskimo mix will not play? (with additional questionable behavior)?

About 3 years ago, I adopted a female Pomeranian/American Eskimo mix named Katie (the mutual name was not intended lol) from a local animal rescue. The woman we had purchased her from said that she was found in an abandoned house with around 20-some other Pomeranians and Pomeranian hybrids. She is...

Answer 4

If you haven't tried you could put a bell on a toy or get one that squeks

Or you could get your other dog to play with her

Give her bones or something tasty

Leave a recording of your voice

Get a fence so she can play out side

Or get professionals help

Hope I helped ~~~~